Tuesday, August 7, 2007

Some things just can't be avoided...

So, because I drink too much DDP past 10pm, among other things, I don't sleep too well... which is why I am writing this now. Some things to note about Utah that most likely helped to procure the phrase "Only in Utah..." (include the subtle, sarcastically slow head shake):


1- The other day I passed a car -nay- a 15-passenger van with the words "CindyRella: Cultural Hall Decor" written on it. Pause. You mean to tell me that some poor woman, who already has 12 kids has taken up decorating weddings as her side job?... But the fact that there is a big enough market for that kind of specialty... cultural hall... really? Guess so. "Only in Utah I guess..."

2- Speaking of large families, I have this adorable friend that I work with who has a large family from Orem, UT. She mentioned that they were going to the lake this weekend and I asked, "ooh, do you guys have a boat?!" She looked at me as though I had never seen a Utan in all my life (and actually, I am not sure I truly have until this moment), then she responded with the obvious answer, "uh, we had 12 kids!" Again... "Only in Utah"...

3- As most of you know, Moffats are known to be highly critical- especially in the art of distinguishing high quality vs. not-so-high quality wedding announcements. I received one this last week that was hand-delivered to me before sacrament meeting (it was like Valentine's day...) All I have to say is unicorns are not even worthy of watermarking... if you thought about it... stop thinking all together- it's a very very bad idea. In fact, few words look good next to unicorns in any setting... "Only in Utah..."
And you can bet your little pioneer boots that that is a Utah-made unicorn cake topper...eat it up. Kwayzee!

Oh- and because it is fun to mock the uselessness of most things in Utah- please add to- with any and all funny noticebles- the green page thanks you.

Monthly wedding invite count: 5
Monthly weddings I am actually going to attend: 1

14 comments:

  1. Unicorns.Hummm. Well allI can say is "Only in Utah!" Since all things start in Utah, I'll be on the watch for Wedding Announcement featuring unicorns in the future. Great blog, it was fun to reaad and get the picture.

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  2. So, I had no idea that this gem of mocking ingenuity existed. I am so glad to have stumbled across your blog. I actually minored in cultural hall decorating, and it is quite a lucrative side business. Um, anyways, I haven't seen you in like years, but it looks like you are doing pretty good for yourself. I especially like your watermelon painted face. That's all.

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  3. AHHHHHH!!! I've beening searching & searching for you! {k, don't feel scared, i'm not a stalker} Yo momma mentioned that y'all had blogs, but for the life of me i have been unable to find you funny friends. and i have tried every combo of links out there! lol.lol. i am so pleased by this new discovery, seeming how i am quite certain your blog with crack me up w/ every update. you're adorable. still. of course. lates!

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  4. and by beening, i mean been.

    i'm awesome.

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  5. At the moment, I'm in AZ, but just for this week (Lindsee's wedding, you know?). I am living in Provo and working in Salt Lake. Gotta love Utah and all of its euphemisms. Okay, I don't really know what that word means but I really wanted to use it.

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  6. Meg. You are soooo funny. Everything in this blog rings true. Luv ya.

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  7. There are only two groups of people: Those who can drink DP after 7pm and those who shouldn't. Every time we are with Dad's side of the family, like Roger, Craig, Mindy...whoever, the hub-hub like commentary is always about how somebody can't sleep if they drink swig too late at night. Ever wonder who in the family started the caffeine-free trend among Moffats? Look no further than Grandma's refrigerator. Stocked with caffeine-free Diet Coke. You can sometimes score a real coke, but only after Eldon has been in town. --Richie (who only comments on swig-related blogs)

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  8. Oh, and I hope you don't mind that I'm adding your link to my blog, because I intend on frequenting yours. If you do mind, I guess the civil thing would be to remove the link, and I guess I can do that. Just let me know.

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  9. This is really funny. And it's kind of sad too, isn't it? I had a friend recently send me a link to a lady reporting the traffic where she ended with "in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen." Maybe we really are in a land of unicorns.

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  10. i don't know how i missed it, but i just discovered all you moffat's have blogs! so, i thought i'd say hi! this is becky hamblin btw...

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  11. and i was signed in as marshall... oops!

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  12. Ha! Your Utah comments are funny! I agree completely! Have you noticed that the Utah ski license plate has an exclamation after it—Utah! Like it’s something special! See this clip: http://youtube.com/watch?v=iSgWVb-5o9E

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  13. Very funny!!

    The only way this story gets better is 10 years from now when you, Richie and Jake are all still in Utah swapping stories.

    Escape while you can!

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  14. You kidding? I am outta here the night I flop my tassle over... Fact- I might be thinking California somewhere too....and yes Kel- I DID notice the exclamation point! I am sad i forgot to reference it!

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